THE HONEST BOOK OF TRUTH
being a BIBLE of The Erisian Movement
and How It was Revealed to
Episkopos LORD OMAR KHAYYAM RAVENHURST, KSC; Bull Goose
of Limbo; and Master Pastor of the Church Invisible of
The Laughing Christ, Hidden Temple of The Happy Jesus,
Laughing Buddha Jesus (LBJ) Ranch
From The Honest Book of Truth
THE BOOK OF EXPLAINATIONS, Chapter I
1. There came one day to Lord Omar, Bull Goose of Limbo, a
Messenger of Our Lady who told him of a Sacred Mound wherein was
buried an Honest Book.
2. And the Angel of Eris bade of the Lord: Go ye hence and dig the Truth, that
ye may come to know it and, knowing it, spread it and, spreading it, wallow in it and
wallowing in it, lie in it and lying in the Truth , become a Poet of the Word and a Sayer
of Sayings - - and inspiration to all men and a Scribe to the Gods.
3. So Omar went forth to the Sacred Mound, which was to the East of Nullah, and
thereupon he worked digging in the sand for five days and five nights, but found no Book.
4. At the end of five days and five nights of digging, it came to pass that Omar was
exhausted. So he put his shovel to one side and bedded himself down on the sand,
using as a pillow a Golden Chest he had uncovered on the first day of his labors.
5. Omar slept.
6. On the fifth day of his sleeping, Lord Omar fell into a Trance, and there came
in the Trance a Dream, and there came to him in the Dream a Messenger of Our Lady
who told him of a Sacred Grove wherein was hidden a Golden Chest.
7. And the Angel of Eris bad of the Lord: Go ye hence and lift the Stash, that ye
come to own it and, owning it, share it and, sharing it, love in it and, loving in it,
it and, dwelling in the Stash, become a Poet of the Word and a Sayer of Sayings - - an
Inspiration to all men and a Scribe to the Gods.
8. But Omar lamented, saying unto the Angel: What is this shit, man? What care I
the Word and Sayings? What care I for the Inspiration of all men? Wherein does it profit
a man to be a Scribe to the Gods when the Scribes of the Governments do nothing, yet
are paid better wages?
9. And, lo, the Angel waxed in anger and Omar was stricken to the Ground by an
Invisible Hand and did not arise for five days and five nights.
10. And it came to pass that on the fifth night he drempt, and in his Dream he had a
Vision, and in this Vision there came unto him a Messenger of Our Lady who entrusted
to him a Rigoletto cigar box containing many filing cards, some of them in packs
with rubber bands around, and upon these cards were sometimes written verses,
while upon others nothing was written.
11. Thereupon the Angel Commanded the Lord: Take ye this Honest Book of Truth to
thine bosom and cherish it. Carry it forth into The Land and lay it before Kings of
Nations and Collectors of Garbage. Preach from it unto the Righteous, that they
may renounce their ways and repent.